Belonging vs Belonging

Did you know that “belonging” helps to strengthen us, in life?

There is a very negative view regarding “belonging,” though. In relationships, quite often we might think, “I belong to you” or “You belong to me,” and yet, there are people who hear the word “belong” and will shut down any further chance of carrying on with that particular conversation, with the thought, “I DON’T BELONG TO ANYONE!”

This is unfortunate.

Many people are scared of becoming objectified. They want to maintain their personal autonomy and integrity. They also have a very distorted view of what it means to belong to someone else.

Our country fought a great civil war that supposedly did away with owning people. To belong to someone is not to be owned by someone else. A person is not a possession. A person is not a mere object.

On our path toward self-actualization, one of the key points to be understood is that we all need to “belong” somewhere… to someone.

Being accepted by a group or a person is one of the most satisfying things that can happen to us, in life, especially when we find that one particular person with whom we can maintain and build a fuller existence.

Have you seen that couple that simply “belongs together”? Well, in order to establish the apparent good life that they display, they have brought each other into their own sphere of acceptance.

Acceptance = belonging.

I tell my fiancée that she belongs to me. I definitely belong to/with her. Years ago, I think that first thought might have elicited a response of my being too possessive. We have both come to understand and accept one another more readily, though, and each of us remains an individual. It’s kind of funny, but each of us, in our individual lives, are stronger as individuals while remaining a couple.

We belong together. I even have her permission to say so!

Do you belong to someone?


This article originally appeared in my “Critical Thought For Your Life” blog, over on I have deleted that blog and re-posted this article here.
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